Karate High School 'Invaders' album

Hey folks, this is Paul from Karate High School. What you’re about to read is what bands call a “bio,” a one-page sales pitch that will typically feed you a bunch of nonsense about how cool and hip we are. If we’re lucky, we’ll come across as legitimate music artists, and you’ll be enticed to either purchase our music and/or come see us perform live. Normally, I would write this pitch in the typical third-person format, filling the page with trite phrases such as, “Karate High School’s new album will astound you with it’s Sasquatch-sized melodies and war-starting, crushing guitars! All the trendy zines say that if you buy it, your Cool-O-Meter will be raised 13 points, and you will instantly become 46% more attractive to the opposite sex!” Oh, the joys of bullshit hyperbole.

I’m supposed to talk about the sound of the band, and tell you what makes these songs different than anything you’ve heard before. But c’mon, let’s face it: there are no original sounds anymore. Everything has already been done. The Beatles already wrote every great song many years before I was born. I’ll never write a Hey Jude. Heck, I’ll never write a Yellow Submarine. The only thing I can do is put as much honesty and creativity into the songs that I can, and hope that they connect with you. With that said, there’s a good chance that we’re not metal enough for you. There is also a good chance that we’re not indie enough for you. I simply write what I enjoy listening to, and if that means that there is a techno polka song next to a blistering hXc breakdown, then that’s what makes the record.

And speaking of records, Karate High School has a new one called Invaders, and it will be released through Eyeball Records on May 19th, 2009. Invaders is a record about life, love, destiny, self-discovery, accomplishments, disappointments, Heaven, Hell, dreams, reality, hope, realizing it’s never too late to follow your heart, and finding beauty and strength in the most peculiar of places. If there’s one theme that keeps coming back throughout the record, it’s that It’s Okay To Be Yourself. I fought with this concept for a long time, and I still do. There is simply too much media telling you how to look, how to act, and selling you answers to your problems that it’s hard to wade through the bullshit and find something real. If you feel this way too, then hey, this record is for you.

I wrote and recorded most of this record in my old bedroom at my mother’s house. No high-priced studio. No big-name producer with fantastic street cred. No money. Aaron played drums. Geoff played guitar. And I played bass, keyboards, and sang. The only thing I had was a minimal amount of recording gear and an overwhelming need to use music as a way to process life experiences, express them, and gain some type of understanding of What The Hell I’m Doing Here. And yes, I am fully aware of how disgustingly pretentious and self-indulgent that sounds. But what can I say? I’m writing this on my laptop at Starbucks while nursing a Venti Decaf White Mocha With Extra Foam, and my thick rimmed glasses and black beret got the best of me. But I digress.

Bottom line: you’re going to love this record. You’re going to cuddle up with it at night and it’s going to give you a back massage while whispering in your ear how hot you are. Then, it’s going to get up early, make you breakfast, wash the dishes, and grind all your Warcraft characters up to Level 80. You’ll be entering a new, exciting relationship. Except, at the end of this relationship, you won’t come home from work to find Invaders in bed with another dude, wearing black socks and a leather mask with a zipper over it’s mouth. This record is loyal, and it wants to love you. You simply have to give it a chance.

Written by: Paul McGuire / Karate High School

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Karate High School - Invaders